Nerd Culture: A Comic-Con Musical! (Part One)

| January 5, 2017 | 0 Comments

Books. Film and TV. Music. Games.

Long ago, the four foundations of nerd culture lived together in harmony. Then, everything changed when the Gatekeepers attacked.

Only the Nerd Movement, comprised of masters from all four schools of fandom, could stop them. But when the world needed them most, they were weeded out – weeded out for simply loving things. Right up to the late 90s, the nerd community continued to face discrimination and mockery, stigmatization for talking too much about the things they loved even if it was trendy at the time. Very often, their passion towards a novel, or a new game, was met with disdain or outright disgust, as if they weren’t cool enough about their reaction. They cared too much.

Years passed, and Aria and her brother Abed found themselves a part of the Neo Nerd Movement, when being a nerd had become the “cool” thing to do. And although the celebrations around their newfound recognition was great, the nerd community still had a lot to learn before they were ready to accept everyone.

That was what the two siblings learnt when they stepped into their first Comic-Con together, initially welcomed with open arms in glorious song:

This is Comic-Con

 

Jedi Knights and Vulcans of every age,

Comic book fans recovering from Dr. Strange,

If you’d like to have some fun,

Come join us at Comic-Con.

 

This is Comic-Con!

This is Comic-Con!

Panels abound about Men of Steel and Dark Knights.

This is Comic-Con,

Everybody get your cosplays on,

Re-enact all your favorite Dragon Ball Z fights.

It’s our Con, everybody squeeee

At six octaves of fangirly glee.

 

“I’m here as Daryl Dixon of The Walking Dead,

Crossbow in hand, and a pocketful of lead.”

“I’m decked out as Assassin’s Creed’s Altair,

With a blade for a finger and a brooding stare.”

 

This is Comic-Con, this is Comic-Con,

Comic-Con! Comic-Con! Comic-Con! Comic-Con!

In this Con, we call home,

Everybody hail to the Firefly theme song.

Sing it once, sing it twice, swing a web and raise your voice! photo credit: Rich.S. New York Comic Con 2016 - Spider-Verse via photopin (license)

Sing it once, sing it twice, swing a web and raise your voice!
photo credit: Rich.S. New York Comic Con 2016 – Spider-Verse via photopin (license)

‘This your first time at Comic-Con?’ asked one of the gatekeepers (not to be confused with the Gatekeepers, capital G, who also happened to haunt the Con). As if to make this distinction clear, he grinned widely as he handed them a brochure, ‘Here’s a list of panels being presented today.’

Abed took the brochure and flipped it open, and his sister peered over his shoulder. ‘Let’s go to that one!’ she said, pointing over to a panel simply labelled “A Whedonian Gathering.” After a moment’s pause, he agreed: Joss Whedon was, of course, one of his favorite auteurs!

It turned out, however, that the panel was designed as a funeral to commemorate the characters that writers like Joss Whedon had killed off the years. Garbed in black, the attendants were singing a sorrowful hymn:

Everyone Dies

 

Why do we endorse so much pain,

When writers like Whedon are so clearly insane,

To the point where we don’t know

If Game of Thrones is real or no

Purely because George R.R. Martin causes us real strain.

 

Listen close to Sirius’ unbeating heart,

And hear that flat lining sound,

Obi-Wan, and his old Jedi friends cut apart,

Put six feet under the ground.

Oh, I can’t believe everybody dies,

Were all those years I invested in them lies?

Oh, at least we’ll be

Inspired by Mufasa’s bravery,

While Simba – and the room ‘round us – cries.

When reached for comment at a later panel, Whedon reportedly said "HAH SUCKAS." photo credit: Gage Skidmore Joss Whedon via photopin (license)

When reached for comment at a later panel, Whedon reportedly said “HAH SUCKAS.”
photo credit: Gage Skidmore Joss Whedon via photopin (license)

Abed and Aria spent an hour crying over the endings of Firefly and Dollhouse with their fellow Whedonians, before departing to attend their next panel, this time on videogames:

The Wonderful Thing About Gamers

 

The wonderful thing about gamers, is gamers are wonderful beings!

They grace worlds with masterful thunder, they drink potions and fly on dragons’ wings,

They wield Keyblades, Pokéballs, Master Swords and Portal Gun-Gun-Guns,

But the most wonderful thing about gamers are they’re always looking to be Player One!

 

Gamers are ambitious fellas, always looking to compete,

If you don’t play at 60fps, they’ll say your equipment’s obsolete:

The wonderful thing about gamers, is gamers can sometimes be brats,

They may be stuck on a mission in Witcher, and will suddenly launch into rants.

But they’re skilled and passionate, coordinated, obstinate, and will run, run, run, run, run,

But the most wonderful thing about gamers are they’re always looking to be Player One!

Always looking to be Player One. photo credit: brianjmatis Blizzcon '09 via photopin (license)

Always looking to be Player One.
photo credit: brianjmatis Blizzcon ’09 via photopin (license)

As they left the panel, Abed and Aria were ecstatic: they had never before been in such a place of inspiration and passion, in which people cared so unapologetically about the kinds of things outsiders often deemed ridiculous.

It was an enchanting experience, at least until their next panel.

To Be Continued in Nerd Culture: A Comic-Con Musical (Part Two)

photo credit: Rich.S. New York Comic Con 2016 – DC via photopin (license)

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Category: Art and Literature, featured, Music, Poetry, Prose and Comedy, TV and Movies

Aaraf Afzal

About the Author ()

Aaraf Afzal is many things, but he is not (yet) a Keyblade Master. He continues to work towards this goal, among others, at Boston University's College of Arts and Sciences where he seems to be majoring in Procrastination. An avid subscriber to the belief that all forms of media have their own sense of artistic beauty, he is particularly invested in writing fiction and recently released his first novel "Re: Revolution" in Bangladesh. Alongside his pursuits at Culture Shock, he's currently at work writing an online series. Next stop: going global! When he is not writing stories, he can be found tucked away under a blanket reading either (A) fantasy novels, (B) TV Tropes, (C) comic books, or, of course, (D) Culture Shock! Giggity.

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