The Stages of Getting a Haircut

| February 1, 2017 | 0 Comments

Step 1: The Breaking Point

It’s that time again — when your haircut has grown out into this dead, tangled, mess. While on one side, you’re petrified at the thought of how any cut besides the one you have will look on you and you hate the idea of letting go of the familiarity of your current hair, on the other side you hate the one-dimensional cut that is your hair and are desperate to change the look. You’re a college student living in Boston in 2017 for crying out loud. If this isn’t the time to be adventurous and get that young, fresh quaff you always wanted, then when is?

Therefore, after about a month or so of contemplating whether or not you want to take the leap, you finally muster up the courage to go and get that haircut you always wanted after you realize that it takes you an hour to blow-dry and style your hair yet it still gets frizzy the moment you walk outside. You call up the nearest salon and you finally make that appointment.

Step 2: Disaster-Proofing

Last time you got a haircut, it ended up being a disaster — however, not this time. This time, you’re coming in prepared. You’re coming in with dozens of pictures of EXACTLY what you want, drawing out every single angle possible, specifying how want your layers cut, the length you want, EVERYTHING to make sure that this time your going to love the haircut you get.


Step 3: The Haircut Appointment

You finally reach the salon, where you meet the perky stylist that is in charge of transforming your look in the next hour or so, and you flash out that picture of exactly the style you want. The stylist analyzes the picture and realizes that the hair you have is too thick to have the sleek hair you want, and that you’re too lazy to go through an hour and a half of meticulous blow-drying in order to maintain that style, and starts to snip away. Considering the stylist sections your hair in a way so that half your hair in your face, you can’t even say shit until it’s too late. All you can do is see the inches of precious hair being snipped away and slowly descend into a state of terror and regret in the process.

Step 4: Despair

When the stylist is done blow-drying your hair and finally reveals the final version of your cut, you can’t help but be hit with a sudden wave of shock for what you have just done to yourself, followed by a sense of despair. You didn’t expect your hair cut to be THIS short!! This wasn’t the picture you drew out! Now your face looks wide, the bangs keep coming into your face, and you look just like your 50-year-old aunt who has essentially the same haircut as you do. You start frantically start ruffling with the cut to try to find any angle, any way of wearing it that will make the style look better, but nothing seems to be working, and there’s nothing you can do but pay the $60 that your haircut was worth and walk away sheepishly overwhelmed with regret

Step 5: Reassurance

You text all of your friends with a picture of your new cut just for reassurance that the decision you made was the right one and that your cut looks great when deep inside, you know they’re all wrong and are just saying that to make you feel better.

Step 6: Acceptance

There comes a point where you have to suck it up, and move on. You vow that next time you go for a haircut; this disaster won’t happen again. And who knows, you may even start liking your haircut after a while


Category: Campus Culture, featured

Maisha Savani

About the Author ()

Hello, my name is Maisha. As an Indian- American, I'm someone who's too Indian to be an American and too American to be Indian. Therefore, in many ways, I'm someone who never really has a home. However, on another note, I'm someone who will ALWAYS find time for TV, and Hollywood and Bollywood movies. Always. Hence, my posts deal with these ideas- cultures clashing, my family, and my love for television.

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